Editor’s Note: It was a toss-up this morning between the cookbook and the story of the decline-and-fall of my folks. I could not make up my mind- but I will keep looking for both to inflict upon you. The dramatis personae include Raven, Big Mama, my sister, Anook of the North, and brother Spike. This is a snapshot of what we were- or were not- thinking about as the family enterprise was coming off the rails….

– Vic

Sigh

(Anook’s day. Lucy image courtesy ABC and Charles Schultz.)

Anook tried to find the birth certificate and/or the passport for Magpie – but failed. The house is in chaos with the remodeling activity. Things that a year ago were in one place are now in new ones, locations of specific items requiring a geologist’s knowledge of stratigraphy to determined and there are none around.
Magpie has a garage full of files and folders dating meticulously by subject from 1947, then commencing at the turn of the century, filed by season.

Anook will head to Traverse City tomorrow and drop off Raven at the “people kennel” and head to Detroit with Magpie. Anook’s rental car has to be returned and the family (daughter & husband) have to regroup and figure out Memorial Day week-end vacation. Anook can sing O, Canada, but doubts it is in the vacation picture anymore.
Anook is guessing her husband will drive the merry group to Ohio to get a birth certificate for Magpie and then head for Niagara Falls and cross over to Canada to see the Shaw Festival plays originally on the agenda. At least the four will be together.

Anook went to Potemkin Village at lunchtime. Big Mama bragged they were already done with lunch. This was a full half hour before lunch began. Anook excused herself and went down to the cafeteria. The staff informed her Big Mama had indeed come down early and they gave Big Mama and Raven soup and coffee and let them go back to the room.

Big Mama complained that meal times changed daily.

Sigh.

Anook made an appointment with Doc B to look over Raven. The children wish to know if he needs to go into Hospice care.

There were only 11 calls to Son #1 today. One of them was about the reported mouse problem in the BIG TOP apartment. Anook agreed to call RAT MAN aka Bug Guy to get him to add the other building to his diligent watch.
Bug Guy – er, Rat Man- made his way to the house. Anook loves Bug Guy. This guy is all business in the wacky weird disgusting business of vermin, pest and bugs. Son #1 says he was a Long Range Reconnaissance Patrol in Vietnam, long ago, a hunter-killer, and in a way he still is.

Anook gave him two keys and took him up to the apartment. Anook complained that Son #1 always locked the interior door and Bug Guy laughed. Bug Guy said Son #1 complained about Anook’s obsessiveness over jimmying the house doors so they cannot be opened with a key.

Anook is all about the garage door openers being the key to access on the property.

Buy Guy had an accident over the winter. A neighbor dog got loose in the bitter cold and he went out to find him. Bug Guy did not cover his face and ended up with a bad case of winter burn – frost bite- or so he thought.
Anook’s heart went thump when he said life was good except for his face. Anook asked him what was wrong with his face – as Anook did not really see there was anything wrong with his face – but it apparently was very upsetting to him. This week he got a new wrinkle with a blister under his eye and he had a red ruddy complexion.

Anook’s heart went thump again when he blew it off by saying it was no big deal -he wasn’t in the game anymore. He was 56 – who cares? He said he didn’t care about his looks. Anook’s heart thumped again.
Anook is 56.

Bug Guy said he would add the other building to his watch – no additional charge. Bug Guy wanted to make sure Son #1 was in full knowledge of the key exchange. Anook assured him he was. Anook talked with him about the neighbors and their parking in the driveway. Anook told him it was good for the family to have them parking at the house. His problem was the way they parked – blocking the driveway. Anook told him she would straighten that out with them as they helped keep the family informed of what was going on with the property.

Bug Guy said he felt responsible for the property. Anook thanked him profusely for being a friend to the family.
When Anook arrived at Potemkin Village, Lovely Rita was at the apartment. She comes periodically to force Raven into the shower. The woman has taken Raven and Big Mama under her Nordic care. She is fierce and protective of Raven, a man essentially long gone – but also of the befuddled Magpie who can no longer even pretend to take care of her husband of 64 years and has given up on that.

Lovely Rita told Anook she had called the home phone to hear the terse message Son #1 had left for all political machines, charities and other unwanteds calls who got the answering machine.

Lovely Rita got everyone from the senior Friendship center to call and listen to it. That was when she decided if things were not good enough for Raven and his care, then she was going straight to the top. She figured no one at the Village would dare to defy Son #1.

Lovely Rita showered, primped, cut nails, made sure two cans of Ensure made it into Raven. She then monitored Raven while he shaved. Raven looked good and alert.

At dinner, Raven finished every last thing. Anook bullied Big Mama to eat. Big Mama had the gall to tell Anook she didn’t care for ice-cream.
LIAR!

The poor people at Potemkin Village only hear from Big Mama that she refuses to fill out the menu choices and that she “hates” everything. This week I saw the weirdest things on her plate. Apparently because Big Mama “hates” everything, they give her only vegetables. Big Mama hates vegetables.
Sigh.

God Bless our neighbors.
God Bless Lovely Rita.
God Bless Bug Man.

Copyright 2011 Anook and Vic
www.vicsocotra.com