Author’s note: This year’s edition of Key West’s infamous Fantasy Fest, a 10 day long party, passed while W and I were on the left coast. These are the sole coherent phrases that recall a distant foggy memory of one such Fantasy Fest night.

I was at the Green Parrot late one October Saturday night, you’ll never guess who walked in
A tourist, perhaps, dressed in red satin like the Devil, acting like the master of sin
He blared at me, “I’ll drink you off your stool”
I said, “Thinking about out-drinking a local will make you the fool”

Thus I became drunker than a Duval Street Satan in satin
He was much worse off, despite all his braggin’
Later I found this prince of darkness prone on the sidewalk
Puking in the gutter and unable to talk
And he wasn’t even through shot 13
Cause on his fourth glass of house tequilla
He started spewing and evacuating condemned souls
And that was before the bartender opened up the Jim Beam

Maybe this satin Satan thought he’d get my soul, if he were to win
So a bit after midnight I asked, “What do I get, when you’re forced to give in?”
He weakly said to me, “If you out-drink me, I’ll be surprised,
but if you do, you can name your own prize.”

It wasn’t quite one, when I again found this ersatz prince of doom
Passed out on the floor of the Parrot’s mens room
I told him, “It might be hard to get me my prize with your head so unclear,
The night is young, I know what I want — GET ME SOME DRAFT BEER!”

Good times were rolling, outdrinking a red satin Satan
At the Parrot’s back bar singing the blues with the band again
The whiskey kept flowing, the smiles did too
I felt pretty good, until I drank them last few

Oh, Lord, God in Heaven, I felt rather tipsy
I shouldn’t have drunk so damn much whiskey
Nor chugged so much beer, nor slammed so much gin
Is this what the priest meant by the “wages of sin”

Oh, Lord, God in Heaven, I felt rather tipsy
I shouldn’t have drunk so damn much whiskey
Nor chugged so much beer, nor slammed so much gin
Is this what the priest meant by the “wages of sin”

Copyright © 2017 From My Isle Seat/H. Jenkins
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