There is a hysterical take-off on Clint Eastwood’s Chrysler-commercial from the Superbowl going around. Clint was apparently surprised by the reaction to his spot about the come-back of the auto industry. Apparently they shot it in New Orleans, with the Crescent City standing in for the Motor City for reasons best known to the makers.

The noir atmosphere evoked his great film Gran Torino, in which an aging Koran War Vet and retired autoworker takes on the Gangs of Detroit, who are apparently all Asian, but it was still a great movie. Anyway, Clint is a Libertarian and did not have an overtly political message about the come back of the baled-out Fiat-owned

MoPar corporation, but some took it that way.

I liked it. Detroit automakers are back on their feet,showing their best profits in years, but good news for the state of Michigan isn’t reflected in the sad state of Detroit. The Motor City’s finances are worse than ever.

The city won’t have enough money to pay its bills by April,unless Mayor Dave Bing can get the council and municipal unions to agree to an agenda of steep spending cuts. By the end of its fiscal year in June, my poor bedraggled and defiant home town will have a budget shortfall of $45 million.

There is also the possibility that the state may take over the city, which would open the door for Detroit to file for bankruptcy. That would make it the largest U.S. city ever to suffer that fate. We will talk about all that as it happens. Instead, let’s think back to some things that Clint did not mention. He is certainly old enough to remember the Old Detroit, and to a scary degree, so are we.

Remember these things?

You took a ‘moonlight cruise’ to Bob-Lo with Captain Bob-Lo or went to Edgewater Amusement Park.

You shopped at Hughes and Hatcher, B Siegel, Peck and Peck, Himelhochs, Robert Hall, Crowley’s, Shoppers Fair, EJ Corvettes or Federals and, of Course, Demery’s.

You remember a J.L. Hudsons Department store in your neighborhood, or the flagship store downtown and an ice cream sundae at Sanders.

You remember Twin Pines Dairy delivered milk  and juice to the chute on

the side of your house and Milky the Clown performed magic with the magic words ‘Twin Pines.’

You remember Olympia Stadium.

You remember when Vernor’s was made on Woodward Ave., and a bearded  dwarf was on the bottle.

Your Mom saved Holden Red Stamps, S&H Green stamps,or Gold Bell Gift stamps, and you licked them into those little books.

SS Kresge’s and Woolworth’s were ‘Five and Ten Stores.’

You know who Bill Kennedy is.

You saw the Detroit Lions play football in Tiger Stadium.

You remember Black Bart and the Faygo song. Or how about ‘Which way did

he go? He went for Faygo, old fashioned root beer!’

You told Mom “Don’t cook tonight! Try Chicken Delight!”

You watched Rita Bell’s prize movies in the morning.

You  remember Jack LeGoff and Van Patrick and Wolf-Man Jack.

You remember Milky the Clown, Soupy Sales, Johnny Ginger,Poopdeck

Paul, Captain Jolly, Sagebrush Shorty and maybe even Sergeant Satko Salute.

You visited the Wonder Bread Bakery and got to take home a mini loaf of bread.

You remember ‘Get on the right track at 9 mile and Mack,to get the best deal in

town. Roy O’Brien, it’s the best deal in town.’

You remember going to Detroit Edison with your Mom to exchange burned-out light bulbs for new ones.

(The old downtown J.L. Hudson’s Department Store.)

Copyright 2012 Vic Socotra
www.vicsocotra.com